The destiny of the greatest republic on Earth is one thing, but what’s Rick Perry’s stance on something REALLY important? Like… college football?
Until this morning it looked as though many of the long standing college athletic conferences would be worked over like onions in a Slap Chop. In particular peril was the Big 12 conference, long time home of perennial football dynasties Texas, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, Texas A&M, Baylor, Kansas, Kansas State, Iowa State, Texas Tech, and Missouri. Due to long festering intra-family squabbles, the conference was on the verge of imploding and its members farmed out to the Pac 12, the SEC, the Big East and God knows where else.
All together now–Exhale.
But don’t underestimate the emotional toll all this drama has exacted on football fans. Billionaire T. Boone Pickens, Oklahoma State alumni extraordinaire, was so distressed about the possible meltdown that he called on Republican Presidential front runner and Texas governor Rick Perry to work his magic to save the conference. In the Oklahoman newspaper, Pickens challenged Perry to show America that “you fix problems, don’t contribute to ‘em.”
It should be noted that Governor Perry was a former Texas A&M (Big 12) Aggies yell leader. (see above) Said Pickens, “After the Aggies leave school, they’re still looking for a yell leader.” Pickens said he told Governor Perry to be that leader. Quick, where’s that cardigan?
Since this national crisis seems to have passed without a Texas Miracle, we’ll have to wait for other challenges to see whether Governor Perry is someone who fixes problems—or contributes to ‘em. (The collie, however, is clearly awesome).