Now this is my kind of theme park: Kuchlbauer’s World of Beer!
Imagine: Beer! Theme Park! Beer! and….Beer!
While I couldn’t be more excited about this brew-meister’s paradise, (located conveniently between Munich and Nurnberg in beautiful Abensburg Germany), I did think of a few slight improvements to the park…
- The It Just Doesn’t Matterhorn toboggan ride: You’ll go faster than is safe but you won’t care because after a few hours at the World of Beer, It Just Doesn’t Matterhorn.
- The Beer-Sexy Hall of Fun House Mirrors: makes the bloat magically disappear.
- Das Drinkendial: Private Long Distance phone booths so you can re-argue the relationship with your ex. And weep.
- The Beer Pong Stadt: Hand/eye coordination meets blood alcohol content before the loudest, most aggressive fans in the entire welt.
- The Blue Danube Wasserwelt: Germany’s most spacious, elegant toilets. You’ll come back again and again!
- Dieter’s Haus of Brats: Opens at 3 a.m. We speak Drunk! (Just steps from The Blue Danube Wasserwelt!)
- Hans’ Beer Goggles: Before you leave, be sure to stagger through the gift shop to pick up a pair - precision engineered to turn a five into an eight!
- Otto-Bahn: A World of Beer staffer named Otto drives you to your hotel really really fast.
- And of course the Einfahrt, which seems…self explanatory.